So I recently acquired P90X. I was told it really worked and that if you stick to it, you can turn into a sexy muscle machine. Well, that made me want to do it lol. Testosterone is pumping. I have my workout clothes on. My sweet work out shoes. And I start it. Man. I didn't expect it to kick my ass the way it did. It kicked my ass all up and down my room from floor to ceiling. It is an hour workout. I did 20 minutes and thought I was going to die. I couldn't breathe right and I was sweating like a mofo. I laid down and tried to catch my breath and regain my composure and then it hit me. This. Feels. Amazing.
I love the burn when working out. I love how it feels to push yourself to get that extra rep in or that extra pull up or sit up. It feels so amazing. It hurts. And I am DEF going to feel it in the morning, but I see this being something I can stick to. I enjoyed the workout and I will be doing the rest of it later on. I think I can I think I can. My mom and sister have been doing it for almost a month now and they STILL can't do an entire hour at once. It is that rigorous. It is all about muscle confusion though. It makes sense. Doing the same workout everyday for a month will get you used to that workout which makes you plateau. But if you do different workouts everyday for a month, there is no way to reach a plateau because your body will be all sorts of confused. I need to do this though. In order for me to get a higher dose of testosterone to at LEAST get to maintenance, I have to lose weight and be in shape. Plus, when the higher dose comes, I don't want all the fat to shift to my gut. That is what happens when you get on higher doses. If I don't have a lot of fat, I will just get leaner. My health is just a concern I have thrown out the window the past few years and I am working on it.
Working in it means I NEED to stop smoking. I NEED to stop drinking. Eating better, exercising more, being more active, etc. The list goes on and on. I just need to be better. You only live once, right? Well, I want to be ripped. Everyone keeps telling me they don't want me to lose weight because my chubbiness is "cute," but I do not agree. I am self conscious and I hate it. I may not act like I am, but I cannot stand my body. For one, I have not had chest surgery yet so the chesticles make it 10 times harder. And from what I have learned in the past when losing weight, you lose the weight first and foremost from your chesticles and arse. I can only hope. I want it all to blend in when I go out in public and I do not want anyone to think I am anything but a man. Oh wouldn't that be the day? *Sigh* A guy can dream, right?
I'm blah blah blahing again. I don't know when I will talk about anything deep. Maybe when I stop being so hard on myself for what I am writing and critiquing everything. We will see. Maybe tonight. Maybe not. Until next time.